Wedding Planning and Mental Health: My Official Pep Talk (and Some Real Talk)
May is Mental Health Awareness Month, and while I’m not a therapist, I do spend a lot of time with couples during one of the most emotional, high-pressure seasons of their lives. So, here it is—my official pep talk and some real talk, from one human to another.
Because wedding planning isn’t always champagne toasts and cake tastings. Sometimes it’s tears in the car after a difficult phone call with a parent. Or staying up way too late stressing over budget spreadsheets. Or feeling guilty for not being more excited when everyone around you thinks you should be.
This post is for you—if you’re feeling the weight of it all. You’re not alone. And you’re not doing anything wrong.
Why Is Wedding Planning So Hard?
Let’s start with the truth: wedding planning is hard because it’s emotional. You’re not just organizing a party—you’re navigating a huge life moment, all while trying to please others, manage stress, and keep living your regular life in the meantime.
Here are just a few reasons why it can feel so heavy:
Budget pressure. Money can bring up stress, even in the healthiest of relationships.
Decision fatigue. There are so many options, and you’re asked to make dozens of choices.
Family dynamics. Emotions run high, and it’s not always easy to keep the peace.
Other life responsibilities. Work, school, caregiving, moving, job changes—wedding planning doesn’t happen in a vacuum.
Comparison culture. Social media can make you feel like you’re falling short if everything isn’t picture-perfect.
It’s a lot. And even with a great planner, supportive partner, and helpful vendor team, the emotional toll is real.
You’re Allowed to Set Boundaries
Here’s your permission slip: you do not have to make wedding planning your full-time personality.
In fact, I encourage couples to be intentional about how much space it takes up in their daily lives. Some simple ways to do that:
Designate “no wedding talk” nights. Give yourselves a break and reconnect over something totally unrelated.
Decide who gets a say. You’re allowed to limit opinions from others—even if they’re well-meaning.
Let go of perfect. No one remembers if your napkins were the exact shade of ivory.
Outsource what you can. A planner can help lighten the mental load, but even delegating small things to trusted friends makes a difference.
Take breaks without guilt. Step away from Pinterest. Go outside. Do something grounding.
Photo by Peach Plum Pear Photo
The “Post-Wedding Blues” Are a Real Thing
Here’s something not enough people talk about: the emotional crash after the wedding.
You spend months (or years) planning, dreaming, and organizing… and then it’s just over. The adrenaline drops, the attention fades, and suddenly you’re left wondering, “Now what?!”
That’s normal. And it doesn’t mean you didn’t love your wedding. It just means your body and brain are adjusting.
Some ways to ease the transition:
Plan something to look forward to. Even a small trip or fun project can help.
Don’t rush the recap. Take your time with photos, thank-you notes, or creating an album. Let the memories settle in.
Talk about it. Be honest with your partner or friends if you feel off. You’re probably not the only one.
Tools and Tips to Lighten the Load
Here are a few practical ways to support your mental well-being during the planning process:
Use a shared planning tool. This helps keep everything organized and collaborative.
Break things into smaller steps. Avoid “all or nothing” thinking—tiny progress still counts.
Set weekly planning check-ins. Keep wedding talk to a set time so it doesn’t spill into everything else.
Celebrate small wins. Booked the caterer? Picked a song? That’s worth acknowledging!
Lean on your team. Your planner, vendors, and community are here to support you.
Resources That Can Help
If things feel especially heavy, please know it’s okay to seek professional support. Here are a few mental health resources worth exploring:
Final Thoughts
Your wedding day should be meaningful, joyful, and full of love—but so should the season leading up to it. And while I’m always here to help with the spreadsheets, timelines, and logistics, I care just as much about how you’re doing as a person.
This is your gentle reminder that you don’t have to carry it all, do it all, or be excited 100% of the time.
You’re allowed to ask for help. You’re allowed to feel a little overwhelmed. And you are absolutely allowed to protect your peace—both during the planning process and after the big day is done.
